GermanyXReader: A Birthday Surprise

“_____!  Ahhh, hey, hey, are you ready to go?!  Come on, come on, I picked out the most awesome restaurant for lunch!  Let’s go!”

You laughed as an excited Prussia crashed through the door of the house you were renting with your fiancé, Germany, who also happened to be his brother.  It was your birthday, but Ludwig had been called away that morning for a meeting and had tasked his older brother with taking you to lunch to celebrate, a duty that the white-haired man was taking surprisingly seriously.

You got up off the couch as Prussia ran over to you, knowing that he’d pull you up if you didn’t. “Alright, alright, I’m ready!” You sighed regretfully. “I just wish-“

“HEY!  NEIN!!!” He shouted instantly, grabbing you and shaking you insistently. “Nein, nein, nein!  West wanted me to take you to lunch so you weren’t alone on your birthday, ja?  But nobody wants you to be too busy missing him to have fun!  So cheer up!”

“Gil-bert-stop-it-!  You’re-shak-ing-my-brains-out!” You protested choppily as he shook you.

“Oh ja.  Sorry!” He flashed you a big grin, looping an arm around your shoulders and ignoring the dizzy eye-blinking you were doing. “Anyway!  Come on, lunch isn’t gonna wait for us forever!”

He steered you to the door then, ignoring you as you asked curiously, “Isn’t the point of a restaurant that you order when you want to?”

“Shut up!” He said cheerfully as you locked the door behind you. “You’re gonna love it, let’s go!  Of course someone as awesome as me would choose the awesomest restaurant in town!”

“Should I even ask what restaurant that is?” You teased.

“Nein!  You’ll see when we get there!”

He opened the passenger door of his car for you then, and you laughed in surprise, praising his gentlemanly behavior, at least until he got impatient and shoved you into the car.  You laughed to yourself as he slid across the hood and leaped into the driver’s seat, though you stopped laughing when you happened to glance at the speedometer after he had been driving for a few minutes.

“Gil?” You said nervously. “Ah…maybe don’t kill me on my birthday?”

He laughed. “Kesese~, don’t be silly, Frau!  I drive like this all the time!  America says I should try out for Nascar!”

You laughed, then looked out the window to hide your panic. ‘That’s not the most reassuring thing to hear…’

Luckily, you made it to ‘the awesomest restaurant in town’ without incident, and you had to laugh when he pulled into the parking lot.  Gilbert flashed you his biggest, cheesiest grin as he ordered you to stay there, jumped out, and opened your door.

“Okay, okay, just whatever you do, don’t tell West I took you here!  He thinks we’re going to that fancy place in the theater district.” Prussia was laughing as he helped you out of the car and closed the door for you. “But it’s your birthday!  I know we aren’t allowed to go here when West is here, but…he’s not here now, is he?  It’s ein birthday treat for you that works for me too!”

You laughed. “I won’t bring it up to him, but if he asks, I have to tell him.  You know we don’t keep secrets from each other.”

“Not even this one?” He whined. “This little tiny itty bitty one?  I did take you to ein restaurant for ein birthday lunch, after all!  Just…not the restaurant he thought.”

You shook your head as you walked toward the restaurant. “Not even this one.  You know our health-obsessed German hates when we eat here!  Especially after the gordita incident.” You shook your head again with a grin as you entered the building. “Sorry, Gilly.  If he doesn’t ask me, I won’t bring it up, but if he asks where we ate, I can’t lie to him.”

“Hmmph.” He pouted. “Why couldn’t you be like all those golddiggers that tried to get with him before he met you?  They would’ve lied, no problem!”

“Because he never would’ve made me your awesome soon-to-be Schwester-in-law if I was!” You laughed.

He laughed, conceding the point. “Ja, ja, okay.  Whatever, let’s order!”

The ‘awesomest restaurant in town’ that you and Gilbert normally weren’t supposed to go to was a Taco Bell.

Germany hated any and all fast food restaurants, but on his list of places he would never set foot in, Taco Bell was second only to McDonald’s.  You had honestly thought he was going to break up with you the time you ordered some gorditas and pretended you had made them on one of the nights it was your turn to cook dinner.

He had softened when you told him that you had just wanted to show him that the food didn’t taste bad, and you felt guilty as soon as he explained that it wasn’t the taste he minded but the fat and salt content.  As an apology, you made healthy steak salads for dinner the next night, even though it was his turn to cook.  He forgave you for poisoning the temple that was his body, and you never asked him to eat at a fast food place again.

But that didn’t mean you stopped, and his excitable brother was the perfect companion when you needed a fix.  You and Gil had eventually come to an understanding with Germany, who agreed that he would stop complaining about your dining choices as long as you stopped eating at his top three worst offenders: McDonald’s, Long John Silver’s, and horror of horrors, Taco Bell.  You had both refused at first, but after being besieged for several weeks by an onslaught of passive-aggressive post-it notes detailing the nutritional value of the menu items at all three places, you agreed.  Wendy’s, Arby’s, and Burger King mostly kept you both satisfied, but of the three you had given up, you missed Taco Bell like it was a friend who had moved away without warning or goodbye.

You felt a little guilty as you got in line, knowing how Germany felt about the food you were about to enjoy, but it was your birthday after all.  Besides that, he had entrusted Gil to take you to lunch; he had to have known where you were going to end up, or at least narrowed it down to one of three places.

The Prussian in question grinned at you then, suggesting that you go choose a table and sit down while he ordered the food. “After all, you’re the birthday madchen!”

“But…how will you know what I want?”

“Please.” He scoffed. “You want ein [favorite soda], und as for your order, how many times have we been here together?  I think I know it by now!”

You laughed and backed off, then left on your search for a table.  You chose one near a window and sat down to wait, pulling out your phone to reread your messages from that morning.

[Luddy-bear: 6:37 AM]: Schatzchen, I’m so sorry I have to go.  I know you are asleep und won’t get this until you wake, but when you do, know that I will be thinking of you every second of every minute until I am home with you again.

[Sent: 6:41 AM]: I’m awake, baby.  I woke up when I heard you start the car to go to the train station.  I wish you could be home, but I know you don’t want to go to a meeting today; it’s not your fault.  Try to relax, okay?

[Luddy-bear: 6:43 AM]: You know I cannot relax without you to show me how, liebe.  You should go back to bed.  I don’t want you to be tired for your birthday lunch.

[Sent: 6:47 AM]: Gil won’t let me be tired, you know how he gets!  Anyway, I’d rather text you while I can.  You won’t be able to talk once you get off the train, right?  I’ll go back to sleep after that.

[Luddy-bear: 6:50 AM]: I am due to arrive at 7:15…but that gives us nearly twenty minutes.  Did you find mein shirt?  I left it on the pillow for you.

[Sent: 6:52 AM]: I’m wearing it right now.  It smells like you.  Thanks for leaving it for me!  I know it bothers you to not put your dirty clothes in the hamper.

[Luddy-bear: 6:55 AM]: It does, but it is your birthday.  If I cannot be there to hold you meinself, mein shirt will have to do.

[Sent: 6:57 AM]: I miss you already, Ludwig.

[Luddy-bear: 7:00 AM]: I miss you too, _____.  Ich liebe dich…I love you.

[Sent: 7:03 AM]: I love you too, spatzi.  Ich liebe dich auch.

[Luddy-bear: 7:07 AM]: Verdammt, the train is early!  Es tut mir Leid, liebe, I have to go.  Have ein wunderbar birthday today, bitte.  I promise I will make it up to you when I get home. (I'm sorry)

[Sent: 7:08 AM]: You don’t need to be sorry, it’s not your fault!  I love you, Luddy.  Bis bald!  (See you soon)

[Luddy-bear: 7:10 AM]: Ich liebe dich auch, _____.  See you soon. (I love you too)

You sighed as you pocketed your phone, missing your man, but Prussia dropped two completely loaded trays of food on the table in front of you just then, making you jump in alarm.  Grinning, he went back to the counter and returned with two more in time to hear you yelp, “What the hell did you do, get one of everything?!”

“Nein, I got two!” He grinned, going back up a third time and returning with two more trays before sitting down. “This is ein birthday lunch after all!  We have to make it special!”

“What’s so special about wasting food?” You frowned. “There’s no way we can eat all that, and we can’t take it home since you broke your fridge trying to slide down the stairs in it and he’ll see it in ours!”

“Worth it.  That was awesome!” He waved away your protests. “Ahhh, chill out!  We’ll go give whatever we don’t eat to that homeless guy by the post office, ja?  He can have ein birthday treat too!”

You blinked at him in surprise. “That’s…that’s a great idea, actually.”

“Hell ja it is, I came up with it!  Now eat!”

You had to laugh then, and Prussia joined you as you both reached first thing for a cheesy potato burrito, wondering how Ludwig could hate something so ‘awesome’.  You stuffed yourselves for nearly forty-five minutes before you packed up the rest and went to the car, where you informed him that if he drove as fast on the way home as he had on the way there, you were going to redo his interior with partially digested burritos and you were going to do it on purpose.

After a quick stop to give the homeless guy the food you hadn’t been able to eat, Prussia got you home and stopped the car. “So how awesome was your birthday?!  Pretty great, right?”

“It was.  Thank you.” You laughed, then gave him a hug.  Sitting back, you asked, “Are you coming in to hang out for a while?”

“Nein, I have to go.  I promised Matty I’d teach him to play guitar like ein awesome rockstar!” He grinned. “Happy birthday, _____.”

“Thanks, Gil.  Bis spater!” (See you later)

“Tschuss!” He grinned as you closed the car door before speeding off. (Bye)

You cringed, then turned your attention to the door as you unlocked it, muttering to yourself. “He’s going to get himself killed that way.”

Rolling your eyes, you entered the house, took off your shoes, and hung your jacket on the hook, a hard-learned habit since Ludwig had scolded you for leaving your jacket lying around every day for a month when you first moved in together.  You chuckled, looking sadly at your phone and sighing. “We’ve been engaged for two, almost three years now, and we were together for five before that…hell, we’ve been living together for what, four years now?”

You laughed again, but it was melancholy. “I still miss him so much when he’s gone…maybe I’ll just get a bath for an hour or three, then put his shirt on and just lay there until I fall asleep.”

You chuckled bitterly as you walked toward your living room. “Happy birthday to _____.  Well…at least I spent it with my second-favorite Beilschmidt, since I couldn’t spend it with my favorite.”

You stopped short then as you looked into the living room to see a giant, brightly wrapped box in the middle of the room.  Something about it seemed off, other than the fact that it was as tall as you and had materialized in your living room, but you couldn’t put your finger on it.

“What the fuck is that thing?” You wondered aloud, walking toward it. “How did it get in here?  How the hell am I supposed to open that? …Wait a minute, I locked the door before I left.  Did somebody break into my fucking house?”

You were right beside the box when you saw a tag on it. “'Pull here'?  Well, at the risk of being as dumb as every horror movie character in existence…okay, I guess.”

You pulled the tag, and the box fell open.  As it did, someone sprang up from inside it, and you automatically did the first two things that your body told you to do.

You screamed.

And you punched him in the face.

He fell with a heavy thud and a grunt more of surprise than pain, and your hands flew to your mouth as you gasped, your eyes widening as you recognized him. “Luddy-!  Oh my god, what are you-?  Luddy, I’m sorry!  I-!”

Mortified, your hands shifted from your mouth to cover your eyes as you blushed and rambled, “I can’t-!  You scared me!  I was never allowed to have Jack-in-the-boxes as a kid because I punched them too!”

Uncovering your eyes finally, you turned horrified, wide [e/c] eyes to his as you knelt down beside him on the floor where he had fallen. “I’m so sorry, Luddy!”

He began to chuckle as he rubbed his jaw. “Schatz…how does such ein klein Frau pack ein punch like that one?” (Treasure...a little woman)

Emotionally overloaded by that point, you huffed your frustration out, then whined, “What are you doing here?  You’re supposed to be in the capital at a meeting!”

You both shifted so you were sitting on the floor together, and he smiled, sky-blue eyes looking warmly at you. “It is possible that the other attendees were…intimidated into ein quick compromise so I could get home to you.  I texted Gilbert to see if he had left to get you yet, und he said this would be ein good way to surprise you…I should have known better.”

He smiled ruefully, fingering his jawline, which had already begun to bruise. “Though if I do have to leave you alone in the future for any length of time, I am glad to know you will be able to protect yourself.”

Still confused, your heart still pounding, and your emotions still going completely haywire, you could only stare at your fiancé and the bruise you had left on his perfect face as your eyes began to water.  He saw this immediately and, flustered, reached out for you. “Nein, liebling, do not cry!” He chuckled, even as he looked down at you in mingled reassurance and concern. “Perhaps it did not work out as I expected, but I am home now und in time to spend the rest of your birthday with you.  Das ist gut, ja?” (That's good, yes?)

“J-ja…?” You answered uncertainly.  You wrapped your arms around him as he hugged you to him, burying your face against the folds of his overcoat.  With the scent of him pervading your senses and his comforting bulk surrounding you, you began to calm down.  Finally, you pulled back and smiled up at him. “Ja, Luddy.  I’m so glad you’re home.”

“Mich auch, _____.” Disentangling himself from your hold, he stood, lifted you, and deposited you onto the couch before standing in front of you with a smile as he reached for the top button on his trenchcoat. “Und as it is your birthday…I have ein surprise for you.” (Me too)

You laughed. “Don’t tell me you’re naked under there?”

He paused in his progress. “Nein, that is not it.” Then, with a grin, he resumed the unbuttoning.  As his fingers made their way down his coat, he hinted, “Of course, you will get whatever you want tonight as well.  Nein…what I have for you under here is clothing.”

Distracted by the X-rated promise, you nonetheless laughed as your curiosity was aroused in addition to the rest of you. “Clothing?” You took a moment to think before you squealed in excitement, “Are you wearing a cop stripper outfit under there?!  Are you about to arrest me?!  I know my rights, Officer…but I’ll waive them if you want to strip-search me.”

He laughed as he undid the last button. “Nein, that is not it either.  Es tut mir Leid, I should have thought of that.  We will go und pick one up after this.”

“Really?” You asked excitedly.

He chuckled, his hands on the flaps of his coat. “Ja, really.  It is your birthday, schatzchen, und you will get whatever you want.  But first…would you like to see your surprise?”

In response to your wordless, excited nod, he laughed.  Then, he opened his coat.

You stared in surprise at the T-shirt he was wearing as you read it, but then you began to laugh.  You laughed so hard that you ended up crying, and Ludwig laughed at your laughter as he sank down onto the couch next to you. “Do you like it, then?”

You couldn’t speak for a moment, still crying from laughing and holding your stomach as it began to hurt from how hard you were laughing.  Staring at his T-shirt, rereading the words ‘Yo quiero Taco Bell’, and taking in the image of a Chihuahua holding a rose in its mouth, you were launched into a fresh wave of hysterics, only managing a nod and a giggled-yet-pained, “Ow, owww!” as you held your stomach. (See Luddy's shirt here: img0.etsystatic.com/052/0/7585…)

Ludwig sat beside you, looking down at you in quiet amusement at something that from anyone else, would have made him angry but, coming from you, he found adorable.  He began to laugh as you hugged him and laughed into his shoulder, and he held you, planting a kiss against your hair. “I know where Gilbert took you today, und it was definitely not to the theater district.  I will never eat anything off the main menu meinself, but…I suppose they cannot ruin ein salad.”

Still giggling, gasping a little as you caught your breath, you asked in disbelief, “What?  Does that mean…?”

Firmly, he nodded. “Ein compromise is in order.  You love it, but because you love me, you have forsaken it.  However…I love you just as much, und I do not want you to give up something you care for because I do not like it.  I simply cannot eat there more than once ein month…but for mein Frau, I can stomach it, once in ein while.”

“Ludwig Beilschmidt!” You laughed, stunned and ecstatic.  You threw your arms around him, kissed him, and declared, “Du bist die Liebe meines Lebens!” (You are the love of my life!)

He laughed as well, though he blushed slightly. “Und you are mine.  Though if I knew all I had to do to hear that was give in to your fast food addiction, I would have made you love me the day we met.”

You smacked his shoulder lightly in protest.  “That’s not why!  I love you because you are the most stubborn man I’ve ever met, and the most health-obsessed, but here you are, making a compromise about something unhealthy, because you love me and you want me to be happy.”

“Ja, liebe.” Electric-blue eyes stared into yours fondly before their owner closed them as he leaned in to kiss your lips. “Because I love you.”

You crawled into his lap then, leaning up and kissing his cheek gently before turning to his ear to murmur, “I’m glad you could be home today…even if you did scare me.”

He smiled fondly as he returned the hug you had wrapped him in. “Happy birthday, _____.  Ich liebe dich…even if you did punch me.”